Buat si dia yg entah siapa dan di mana

Sekali dgr je terpaut... (^_^)

Astaghfirullah...jgn lagho...jgn..

Time flies

23:44 19/9/2011
One day left before I have to say goodbye para mi casa. Leaving home this year is much harder than I thought. Mama still does not show any sign of improvement but I know Abah is there to keep her company. If only I could stay longer, I would not think twice. No matter what the reality is what we've got to face. If I keep longing for stability and situation unchanged, then life wont move forward. I wanted to go over Mama, hug her and tell her that she could actually go back to being her old self again. But I couldn't lie, if not to her but at least to my own self.  How fast time flies..this is how my summer break ends...Ya Allah Ya Rahim, I just one for the best for everyone. Keep my family safe here..Biyadikal khair..

Blowing O o O o making you Go

"Best sangat ke merokok ni? Rasa apa kalau smoking?"

If we ask this kind of questions to regular smokers, how will they usually respond? I think the most convincing statement that they are able to provide maybe to maintain their alertness [driving], reducing tense [ amazingly, spending RM10 for a pack of 20 cigarettes does not bring tense] with many other excuses. Rationally thinking, there is no positive reason for consuming cigarettes but till now I keep wondering why people are still spending on that smelly things as if it is an essence of life. Anyway, cigarette was quite an issue that setting my precious final Friday- the day that Ayah Su was arranged to have a surgery to remove his tumor. Early in the morning, we gathered at An Nisa' hospital to accompany Ayah Sun and his wife. Around 2 hours before the operation began,  the other family members chatted about funny stories to make Ayah Su forget about his fear for awhile. It began with abah who came out with discipline problems of his students that he could recall. Turning back to Ayah Su, he admitted that he smoked when he was in secondary school but he said it was secretly done with mounting fear of being spotted by any villagers. The situation was not as worse as what is shown by students nowadays. They are so brave to smoke openly at any stalls, 2 meters away from the school gate. At distance Ayah Su described the food stall near to SMK Gaal appears pretty much like Kedai Bahulu every morning due to mushroom cloud of smoke in the area [Uff suddenly the images of fresh bahulu Bukit Jawa flashing in mind..hehe]. That story burst us into laughter, that's pretty common when Ayah Su opened his mouth and shared things. The most awaiting moment for me and all my cousings in every raya is listening to Ayah Su's stories..

Few minutes later the atmosphere changed, where everyone's vision became blurry and tears began to roll down. As if someone was envied of our merriment, Ayah Su was called by a nurse to get ready for his operation. The 6 hour operation is quite risky because the jaw area has complex vessels and neurons. It requires expertise to ensure that his brain and all senses won't be affected. Nobody could hold their emotion, so did I, especially when Ayah Su said in his prayer, "Seandainya ajal aku menghampiri, aku redha dan bersedia Ya Allah". 

Seeing Ayah Su in the surgical attire was really aching our hearts. It's hard to describe that sorrow moment. I just could not recall whether I've been in such saddening circumstance before. After Ayah su was brought to OT, we went to the ward to do whatever we could, performing solat hajat, reciting prayers and so on. Everyone seemed to hide their real feeling-the truth that only Him knows.

Well, to cut it short, suddenly we received a call from the staff nurse. Guess what? The operation could not be completed because Ayah Su smoked that morning. He said he took cigarettes because he could not bear with the anxious feeling. Yes, he did fast as instructed but he did not expect that the fast should be real (without smoking). The nicotine clogged heart vessels which is unsafe condition for the surgery. The doctors cancelled it in order to downplay the risk and avoiding more serious complications to the heart. Ayah Su has to endure the pain on his face longer. The doctors asked him to quit smoking for his heart condition to be absolutely stable.

I despise cigarette. Enough said.

*******

 “...he [the Prophet] commands them what is just, and forbids them what is evil; he allows them as lawful what is good, and prohibits them from what is bad..." (Qur'an 7:157).

kuci-kuci pampers hei

What makes this year's Syawal a lot different? The answer is one-babies and kids! Ho yeah!! Those babies were the most wonderful source of joy and merriment. They were the center of attraction, really. 2011- abah has 7 grandchildren. Another one will soon join those kiddies in the nearest time. Subhanallah..

1. Nur Elleya Syazwin 8 yrs old
Wah..this cucu sulung is growing up with stunning supermodel feature.Her obsession in pinky and girlish stuffs seems to be more obvious as times goes by. And also.. fan of Justin Bieber [erkk..]. Plus, her fondness for any movies with hantu setan momok santau elements in also develops simultaneously with her intelligence- she's among the smartest in Sekolah Rendah Puteri Pandan. Alhamdulillah..
Hurm, what else can be described about Elleya..she is also very open in expressing her love. I remember her words when she recalled the departure scene during the previous raya. "Elleya x nangis depan orang, tapi dalam kereta Elleya nangis la..sebab rindu.." It has been 3 years that she celebrated raya without a mother by her side. That's the reason why I've got to accept that she becomes too clingy to me.
I could feel the pain in her heart, but there's no cure that I'm able to provide..Sabar ye Eya :') Jadilah anak yang tabah, you always have my trust.

-Card and a Raya gift from Elleya-

2. Puteri Qistina Balqish 6 years old

Puteri Saadong

Her laughter once was an earth shaker, yet now she has changed totally. Perhaps to secure her throne as the puteri of my family. Agaknyalah.. =D On the first day of Raya she asked me for something incredibly unreasonable. "Nunu jom pegi kedai beli buku...!!" when I replied, "penjual buku pon jual lemang raya2 ni" then she shouted "alamak!!.."

3. Nik Emran Shah 6 years old

Emran

Hero Malaya Tok Bah who is also a fan of KL Gangster movie. I feel like cutting his tongue every time when he threw bad words. Shamsul Yusof and his team, stop producing gangster movies laa..haih. Emran still deserves respect when it comes to drawing precision from the inter-cousins drawing competition held by Kak Nor. We can see his talent..biso3!!

4. Nik Hanis Aishah 2 years old

What can I share about Aisyah...hurm, she is aware of her position as a Kakak but it was quite unbearable to deal with her unpredictable 'weather'. I think she needs more attention...In order to satisfy her and at the same time to sustain her happy mood, most of the raya time, all of us watched BabyTV on Astro with silent cry in heart...waaa..ABC 123...bosey. The boredom of the other eyes in the house do no seem to mean much for this innocent Aishah...bosey3!

Hang Lutpi

5. Nik Mohd Lutfil Hadi 2 years old
The best part is when they show some kind of actions that can make us laugh. Lutfi is the best at this. He performed solat at the middle of crowd, at the time when we were having ketupat n rendang during the raya evening..even crazier, he always comes up with a scary flirting action, falling his body into emran's and stay motionless..eugh.. =D

Qashrina

6. Puteri Qashrina Balqish 1 year old

This girl is the most polite niece I've ever had and met. It's so hard to see her crying. She prefers to have sharp breathing a few seconds, signalling that it will turn to sobs while tears accompanied with loud cry comes last. She will try hard to be patient all the time. She's just so cool with more like a bintang filim's egoistic manner. Her smile worth a million, or maybe more than that. Oh Qashrina, please don't grow up =D

7. Nik Mohd Asyraf 1 year old

Aisyah ands Asyraf

Asyraf, the king of hope. His attempts by menggeliat and bergeleloks are parts of his strategy to force us to carry him and keep walking. As long as he is held high with bits of motion, everything will be fine for HIM. You stand still, then he will bergelelok again.. haih..He's quite ambitious as he joins the elder cousins to play ball without realizing that he's still in the paralympic category..hehe...Asyraf the macho-man

**By the way, I just realized that their names are long, as long as mine. Is it genetically destined or what? ;P